Sunday, July 13, 2008

finally!


Something extraordinary has happened.

Honestly.

I can hardly believe it.

A week ago something huge shifted into our world. It was literally overnight. I can pinpoint when it happened. I've been holding my breath since, but it has maintained for a week now. It's real. It's transforming my days and making them what I've been dreaming of. Arguments, stress, pain, exhaustion aside...I can almost dare to believe that it's real.

I'm going to tell you now, but let's not speak of it lest we jinx it. I'm going to tell you, and then we'll walk away from the secret for a while, until we're sure that it's real. Because if I'm dreaming and this new change disappears then I will very definitely need to be heavily medicated for the forseeable future, because I can't go back again. So we can't jinx it. Pretend we didn't even discuss it. Nothing to see here, move along.

So here's the secret to what's giving me hope beyond all hope, to what is beginning to make me feel like my whole entire journey has been worth it...


...After long and hellish weeks, I'm okay. I've forgiven myself.

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