::: just shut up florence! shut up :::

Refresh me, form the memories i had in mind. refresh every inch of my nerves. Do me a favor, reassure me about it. Teach me how to talk, teach me how to fight, teach me how to be brave in showing myself. It helps me a lot when stones used to criticized me. But it hurts me a lot when those stones see me as someone who do not have a backbone, someone who's so lost in despair. That down... 6 feet under, beneath those black graves and evil shadows from the past. I know myself, i have my own identity but i just don't have the courage to love myself my shell or my scale, the color of my fur or the color of my feathers. I know what i like, i know my hobbies just please don't judge me!. There's a big difference when you tell me to find my identity and try to love myself, from try to love what i like and try to accept my imperfections. I'm not an iguana that rolls its eyes in a different angle nor a chameleon whose imitating anyone. I just don't like the idea of labeling me as someone who do not think but feel. Yes, i do give the idea of making anyone think I'm too available. That is why i always do fall into somewhere i don't wanna be. The point of getting hurt. The point of crying over someone who doesn't deserve my every drop. I am aware of that, that is why my outlet is to talk about it and not just to keep it inside in order for my air to rotate inside. Breathe, I'm just taking a break for something, and thats it. I don't usually talk about how i feel but this is my only way. Every time i get messy or sad that doesn't mean they occupied every inch of my sanity. I am still with my senses and i also do analyze things. But i just choose to feel it, just a time or a moment, a time to forget and delete it. Yes i do talk a lot about it just to calm me and make me at ease. One favor! please do not misjudge me!